I wanted something like "Meyuck". Sort of a sound that expresses a very blah and long day, a day when my heart is heavy when I get finished. That was today. I have a tendency to feel this way at least once every 3 months or so. I don’t know how I do it, but I find a way to say something stupid and hurt someone’s feelings. It is normally something that I think is so benign that I don’t even realize that it was a problem. Then I find out that once again my big stupid mouth is getting me into trouble and I just feel like crap.
I always have the same feeling, like all of the work that I do is ruined because of my own flippant comments.
But as I sit here I think I am getting some perspective. If it was all my work then I could destroy it with a comment because I don’t really have that much power to make something that is lasting. But if it is God’s work and if God is the one who is working in the lives of students then I don’t have enough power to mess that up. Too often I make it all about me but it isn’t about me. When I make it about me I am setting myself up to fail. When it is about God that is when it is good. This was a week that I forgot to make it about God.