Alright, I’m not a girl, so I don’t really understand this, (actually I was the guy on the other end of this a few times so maybe I understand it too well) but how do I as a youth pastor warn girls about dating guys who are much older than them? I have a student who is still in high school and is dating a guy who is 24. How do I show her, and all of the other girls who go running down this road that such a relationship is not only not healthy, but possibly dangerous.
It must seem like such a thrill to have an older guy like you. It must seem like you are "mature" and grown up in ways that dating guys your own age can’t quite make you feel. So how can you combat that good feeling with the truth that any 20 year old that still wants to go through the trouble of dating a girl in high school has some serious issues. That any guy who is trying to go out with someone that much younger than him is at best immature and looking for an easy relationship and at worst looking for an easy target.
In my role as a youth pastor this has to be one of my biggest struggles. How do you help students see how destructive their relationships are–especially when they "love him"? I guess some of these lessons are ones that just need to be learned through living, but I want so desperately to help them avoid some of the heartache.
I also have selfish motives too. There is nothing that kills the involvement of a senior leader faster than meeting an older guy. It is like they are suddenly way too important to be involved. This isn’t always the case, but it happens more times than not.
I just wish there was a magic formula for how to deal with these situations and I wish just once someone would listen to me when I tried to warn them.