I didn’t give an update last week, but the girl for whom I decided to meet on business meeting night didn’t come–last week anyway, but this week she came.
I have a whole group of students who I love and who I would do anything for. There is my wonderful group of gamer guys who are each funny and fun and amazing in their own way. There are the sisters who are always there, always supporting, adding their grace and laughter to what we do. There are the twins with their combination of fire and love. There are the country kids who talk slow and southern but who make me smile more than they will ever know. There are those kids who sit back in the back who feel like they aren’t really a part, but they are a deep part of my heart and I try every week to make sure that they know that. There are singers and smile-ers and friends. These people are with me every week and I appreciate them more than I can say.
But when she came through the door, I felt like God had answered my prayer. This young lady is the kind of seeker that I love. She is honest about who she is and what she feels about God. She isn’t afraid to speak her beliefs or take the time to listen to mine. For 2 years now I have been talking to her at lunch in the school–sharing with her the truth about God’s love and learning about her life. But tonight she decided to come.
Church still wasn’t quite her thing, but she came. When I first started talking I felt this amazing pressure, like this might be the one chance that I get to tell this girl about the love of God. But about halfway through I just gave up trying to impress her and just spoke truth. Afterwards, we stood by her car and talked some more. She was desperate to get away, but desperate for someone to listen to her too. It felt good being that guy for her. It felt good sharing with her God’s love love by being a listening ear. It felt good to see her go from "I don’t know I still don’t quite feel right here" to "I’ll try to come back."
There are days when this job feels like it is sucking my soul from my body, but tonight she came, and I remembered why I do it. Tonight I felt the joy of making a difference–even in a small way–and it feels so good I had to just close my eyes and smile.